I often get asked the question - why putting yourself first is a game-changer?
When you are a heart-centered, empathetic woman you can easily find yourself putting everyone else’s needs before your own. You might even feel responsible for how other people feel and have a hard time saying no. You are always there for your partner, friends and family members and somewhat depend on their validation. Since you tend to spend a great deal of time doing things for others, you have very little time left for yourself. And when you finally do, you feel so guilty about doing something “only” for your own that you often self-sabotage your desires.
Does any of this sound familiar? Then you might be a people pleaser.
One of the most important lessons I learned in life is that putting myself - my soul’s purpose, my journey, my happiness and my desires - must be a non-negotiable priority.
I never really thought I was a people pleaser until one day, as I was working my way through my own stories and limiting beliefs, an sudden realization hit me. I’m a notorious second-runner! I usually follow my desires and generally do what feels best for me but I tend to consider how it’d make my loved ones and slightly alter my dreams match everyone else’s needs. The goal remains the same but the execution is altered based on how it’s best for everyone. In other words, nothing ever is 100% my way.
In that very moment my entire life collapsed for a moment and it all started to make perfect sense. I often used to feel secondary in relationships. I always had big goals and went after my dreams but somehow never actually truly fulfilled them. It seemed as if I hit the plateau by 80-90-95% and there was no way to break that pattern. I worked hard, put in all the effort and even went against my own needs at times, just to fulfill my own desires. Yet, something was not working.
That day, changed the rest of my life. I finally understood what was holding me back from reaching my full potential - myself and my consent to being secondary in my own life. All I had to do was to peel back all the layers of it before I finally let it go.
Insights like this only come around when you tune into your heart’s frequency and allow yourself to get vulnerable. The truth is, that pleasing others never really works. No one is responsible for your happiness and neither should you be responsible for other’s. Altering your dreams and desires in any ways will enforce the subconscious belief that you are not worth getting it all. And that is simply a lie.
Every singe human being in this world deserves to pursue their heart’s calling and put their own desires before everyone and everything else. That’s how you take ownership of your own worth and teach others how to treat you. The universe rewards the bold.
5 Powerful Ways To Put Yourself First
Increase Your Self-Love. More compassionate you are with yourself, more love and appreciation you will receive from others. It’s that simple.
Honor Your Own Needs. Pay homage to yourself by respecting your desires. Don’t push against your will. Listen to your heart’s whispers and allow yourself to do what feels right. You are worth the celebration.
Improve Your Self-Awareness. Take time to get to know yourself. Your desires are unique to you and the only way to fulfill them is to understand what you truly want at the first place. Don’t underestimate the importance of getting clear on intentions. Journal, mediate and find ways to connect to yourself.
Be More Authentic. Authenticity is a superpower and is essential to feel amazing in your skin. More you allow your true essence to come forth, more genuine your presence becomes, which attracts the right people in your life. Nothing is more liberating than being yourself all the time!
Don’t compromise your desires. How you value yourself is how people will value you and ALL what you do for them. Make yourself a non-negotiable priority and don’t let anyone make you feel guilty for putting your own needs first.
Learning to put yourself first is a process. Don’t expect things to change overnight! Be OK with taking baby steps remember to celebrate every little success. And if you are ready to turbo boost your progress, come and join me and 5 amazing heart-centered women in the Soul-Aligned Style™ Bootcamp to build that connection with yourself and bust the stories and limiting beliefs that are stopping you from achieving real change.
Are you ready to step into your power?
Veronika Nemeth is the Founder and Creative Director of The Stylish Female Society. She is a seasoned Image Consultant, Personal Branding Expert and Transformational (Life)Style Coach teaching heart-centered women how to step into their power and build a confident and stylish presence from the inside out. Her mission is to empower women to shine their own light and be confident in looking and feeling their best. Her Soul-Aligned Style™method is a holistic approach to style that includes wardrobe, beauty, mindset and healthy lifestyle advice.