During the summer, I like to take my laptop to one of Milan’s many cafés, sit outside in the sunshine with a cappuccino, and do my work as the world passes by.
Often, I wear what I work from home in – jeans, sneakers and a t-shirt.
On one particular occasion, I felt as if I should make more of an effort – after all, I am a businesswoman, not a student! I switched my sneakers for ballet pumps, my t-shirt for a pretty blouse, and added a statement necklace and a swipe of lip gloss.
As I sat there, I noticed another lady sitting by me, also apparently working on her business. We exchanged smiles, and she approached me. We each introduced ourselves and found we had a lot in common – so much so that we could help each other with our respective businesses. It was one of those “right place, right time, “the Universe has your back” kind of meetings!
My question is, would this have happened if I had not made an effort with my appearance that day? If I had given the impression of a young girl studying, rather than a woman working, would my now friend have taken a second glance at me?
As a Style Coach, I regularly come across women who feel stuck in their lives. They may be stuck in their relationship, their career or their financial situation. They don’t know what to do – so they don’t do anything.
I work with my clients to help them cultivate the habit of using their image to make them feel good about themselves (and we all know how easy it is to allow our image to make us feel bad about ourselves!).
Whether you realise it or not, your clothes and your image influence your behaviour. Your outward appearance can impact your life experience – it can help you to get what you want, or it can work against you and attract what you don’t want.
If you want people to respect you, then you have to respect yourself. And respecting yourself means investing in yourself.
“Investing” in yourself doesn’t just mean spending money (although I do recommend working out what your style budget is so that you can make the most of it!) – it means spending time and effort thinking about your image. Regularly decluttering your closet, planning your outfits in advance, figuring out what looks good on you, and ensuring that your clothes are well laundered and cared for.
Dressing as a “woman” gives you a strong presence. You may be surprised at how it can up-level your life, as well as the way you feel about yourself. A “grown-up” style will change your behavior, your confidence and your self-belief – and in turn, your personal and professional encounters will become more positive.
So, are you a girl or a woman?
wears clothes that used fit her and/or were trendy ten years ago, but not anymore. Her clothes are too small, too short, out of style, and the colors no longer flatter her skin tone.
doesn’t dress for her body shape. She wears clothes she likes regardless of the fact that they don’t suit her.
doesn’t know what suits her.
has the same hairstyle and makeup that she had at university. Her hair’s too long, or it’s always pulled back into a ponytail, or it’s just un-styled.
wears showy clothes that aren’t appropriate for the situation. Her skirts can be too short, her dresses too tight, and her tops are too low-cut.
also keeps it far too casual. If you’re not on your way to a yoga class, at a yoga class, or on your way home from a yoga class - why are you wearing your yoga pants?
buys into trends and “must have” styles. She looks the same as everyone else.
travels with all her clothes because “you never know”.
knows her worth, and embraces her body (and age).
has an identifiable signature style, and can pull off any dress code without sacrificing her personality.
makes sure that her hair, nails and makeup are always appropriate (not too little, not too much).
is sexy without “putting everything out there”. She wears grown-up materials - silk, cashmere, wool, and invests in quality lingerie.
always dresses for her body shape, and shops for classics with a little twist to stay up-to-date.
knows how to travel light and look stylish even on the road.
embraces her own style, doesn’t compete with, or copy, anyone else. She sticks with the things that work for her.
If you’d like some help finding your inner woman, download my FREE Chic Sheet and start your soul-aligned style journey today. I’ve created this guide to help you tap into your true essence and create an authentic, grown-up style that reveals your inner beauty and makes you feel stylish & beautiful from within.
Veronika Nemeth is the Founder and Creative Director of The Stylish Female Society. She is a seasoned Image Consultant, Personal Branding Expert and Transformational (Life)Style Coach helping heart-centered women to find their soul-aligned style and create a magnetic presence online & offline by uncovering their true essence and revealing their inner beauty through their style.
Her mission is to inspire women to step into their power, live their own truth and shine their authentic light through being the best version of them.